Ole Crooked Nose Quits In Chi-Town

Andy Fantuz has quit the Chicago Bears! At least that’s what I heard up here in Saskatoon. When people from Regina get news, they tell people at the Bus Depot who then come up to Saskatoon (on a bus) and tell people the news. From there to me, sometimes the message gets confused.

Here is what I heard: Fantuz was mad ‘cuz they only threw him 2 balls in 4 games. Also, he couldn’t find his cereal anywhere in Chicago. So, he quit. He will play in the Banjo Bowl in Winnipeg on Sept. 11. As you see in these photographs, he is running away from The Bears at a rate of about 4.7 seconds/40 yards. The photo on the right is taken just 1.3 seconds after the photo on the left.

That’s all I know for sure right now.

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Author: Toontown Rat

He is a long time Saskatoon resident and moderately important cog in the machinery of Prairie Dog's little sister, Planet S Magazine.