Daily Aggregation: Octopus Love

daily-aggregation-21. COUNTDOWN TO NEW ANTI-TERRORISM LEGISLATION The Conservatives will bring in new so-called anti-terrorism legislation tomorrow. Will it be awesome and save Canadians from Islamic State nutjobs? Will it be useless, like the anti-spam legislation that doesn’t keep spam out of my in-box? Will it be an attempt to criminalize ideas and opinions this government doesn’t like, in much the way the Canada Revenue Agency only seems to audit charities for political activities Stephen Harper doesn’t like? Prediction: no, yes and probably. What else would you expect from a government that says mass surveillance is just peachy?

2. BRING ON THE FIRST NATIONS VOTERS If more First Nations people vote they could change election outcomes in Saskatchewan for the better.

3. SUICIDAL SOLITARY SITUATIONS Canada corrections investigator is concerned about reforms to the way solitary confinement is used in Canada, so he’s written a letter to the Harper government. But with cuts to Canada Post, who knows when that will show up.

4. OFFICIALLY A CONVICTED BABY MURDERER Adam Cyr is guilty.

5. LOW-RISK OFFENDER FACILITY CLOSES The NDP says that’s almost certainly correctly, that this is a terrible idea.

6. THE LOONY SUCKS Slurp slurp.

7. EBOLA IS MUTATING Great!

8. MEDICAL EXPERIMENTATION ON MR. HOCKEY Gordie Howe gets shot-up with Tijuana stem cells. (Warning: when you click the link, a video will rudely play automatically because Postmedia business goofs are short-sighted fuckwits who think that making the Internet suck is good for business.)

9. WELL, JORGE, THE GUARDIAN LIKED INHERENT VICE The best English language newspaper in the world joins armchair critics Aidan Morgan and Stephen Whitworth to challenge the tyranny of Castillo’s wrong opinion on a movie. Take THAT, Jorge.

VIDEO: BABY OCTOPUS STROLL Thanks to Charles Atlas Sheppard for sharing this on Facebook, alerting me to it.  Whoops, just noticed that you’re supposed to get permission to use this video. Not gonna. So, I guess we need a different one. How about this?

You can see the original video here.

Also: I’m sorry Priscilla pooped on you the other night, Charles.

Author: Stephen Whitworth

Prairie Dog editor Stephen Whitworth was carried to Regina in a swarm of bees. He's been with Prairie Dog since May 1999 and will die at his keyboard before admitting his career a terrible, terrible mistake.

5 thoughts on “Daily Aggregation: Octopus Love”

  1. (1) Blame your spam filter, Stephen.
    (2) Depends on where their voted go.
    (7) Viruses mutate; that’s their nature. As the article notes, Ebola may become more contagious, but it may also become less deadly.
    (9) My choice for a Pynchon film would have been “Gravity’s Rainbow”, but hey. Pynchon is not an easy read, so why should his work make an easy film?

  2. 4. Mr. Cyr seems to have been unjustly accused.

    His lawyer said that certain points were not regarded,in their decision.

    9 hrs only for a jury to convict him.. ?

    Were they just bored of the whole process,& wanted to get back to their own daily bla bla ?

    Putting a person in jail for 25yrs ( minimum ), is never easy, but did they really pay attention to the defense?

    I’m not connected at all.

    Good thing we are not in the “G W Bush Texas” era. Guilty by presumption.

    Where are the Free ADAM T-shirts ?
    Not easy to do much of anything when you are “inside” .

  3. #1 Nothing like dropping big news on a Friday. From Noah Baumbach’s Kicking & Screaming (1995), the Canadian public’s apathetic relationship with its abusive government (various characters sniping at eachother, spanning scenes into Grover’s flashback between him & Jane:

    This place is a pigsty.

    What’s that you’re doing?

    Huh? Oh, I’m, uh, measuring the distance
    from the couch to the TV.

    Uh, Chet said that we’ve been sitting
    a couple inches too close.

    Don’t you find all that television
    watching’s a waste of time?

    Of course. But you’re doing the crossword, which
    is just as much a waste of time, if not a greater one.

    Yeah, but at least I’m thinking of words
    and roots of words and sometimes in Latin.

    A waste of time, yes.
    A bigger waste of time than TV? No.

    Anyone beat off today?

    – Hey, Grover. How’s your dad?
    – That was Mom.

    Oh. How is Julie?

    Isn’t it bad enough
    to be whipped by your own mother…

    you have to have this wussy
    relationship with Grover’s?

    You are a jackanapes.

    – A jackanapes!
    – Jackanapes.

    Can we skip the pleasantries
    and finish our conversation, Mr. Book Club?

    Lay off the book club.
    I watch TV with a critical eye.

    If I get truly sucked in,
    I know it’s time to change the channel.

    “Is it abbreviated?” “Is it plural?”
    These are the questions I have to ask myself.

    – Max, can I ask you a question? – Your attention
    span is, like, one-quarter of a music video.

    There are many dull parts in the videos.

    – Max, did you screw Miami?
    – What?

    – Otis?
    – I thought he knew.

    No, I just told you…
    out of guilt.

    We’ve developed such a weak, pathetic familiarity
    that talking to you is like talking to myself.

    I think the operative words in this situation
    are “weak” and “pathetic. ”

    What are we supposed to do
    with this information? I don’t want it.

    Well, then give it back.

    And stop looking at me, Chet.
    I can see he’s judging me.

    Stop judging me!
    Put the broom down! Stop cleaning!

    Well, you’ll do what you wanna do.
    But Skippy is your fr-

    Shut up!

    Max.

    How was she?

    – What’s wrong?
    – Nothing.

    It’s just, you gave me a black cup.
    I can’t drink from a black cup.

    Huh.

    It’s just too much black. See, I –
    All that black, I can’t see the coffee.

    I like to see what I’m drinking.

    Yeah.

    I don’t like raisins.

    It’s so funny, because my mother,
    she used to make me eat them…

    even though she knew
    that I hated them.

    And then she – she –

    The end.

    Fifty cents.

    – What’s this?
    – For my raisin story.

    When I tell a bad story,
    I like to pay people for their time.

    No, I liked it. It was good.
    It was short, but I liked it.

    Especially the part about your mother.

    – Really? You did?
    – Yeah.

    I’ll just –
    I’ll take a quarter.

    Do you, uh…

    want that?

    No, no. That’s -That’s okay.

    That’s –

    My parents –

    They still come and visit me
    after four years.

    You’d think they’d be sick of it.

    – Your parents still together?
    – You know.

    Ooh.

    – What are you writing?
    – I don’t know.

    I’ve always thought that my parents were part
    of the trickle-down method of parenting…

    like a reflection on the Reagan years –
    look good to a lot of people.

    But, basically, I’m paying
    for all that neglect now.

    I guess my parents have sort of
    a Lyndon Johnson feel to them…

    like there’s no satisfactory reason
    why they became parents…

    like my real parents
    were assassinated…

    and these people
    just were next in line for the job.

Comments are closed.