Daily Aggregation: Aaaarrrrrrrrrgh

daily-aggregation-2ANNOYED EDITOR’S NOTE: I spent three hours putzing around with today’s Daily Aggregation — what can I say, I was on a roll! — so naturally, as soon as I finished it, the Internet devoured it. The file, which should’ve been autosaved countless times, is inexplicably gone. It’s not in “drafts”, it’s not in “scheduled”; it’s not even in the trash. It’s dead, vanished, kaput. It’s not pining for the fjords, it’s pushing up daisies. It is an ex-blog post.

I say, “Pfft! Whatever.” You can’t crush my spirit, Internet. I’ll just write it again!

1. A LESS KILLY CANADA The country’s murder rate drops to its lowest level since 1966. Hooray! The highest murder rates in this less homicidal country? You’ll find ’em in Manitoba, Saskatchewan and Alberta. Hey, I wonder what Canadian city has the highest murder rate… oh, dear.

2. THEN AGAIN, WE ARE KILLING THE ENVIRONMENT… Canada remains brutality out-of-step with most of the rest of the planet on climate change, the most important issue facing humanity which the do-nothing governments of Chretien and Martin ignored and which the  Harper government has treated with ignorance, contempt and malice. Maybe these guys should be tried for ecocide.

3. CANADIANS DON’T HAVE A RIGHT TO HOUSING: ONTARIO COURT Are you kidding me?

4. NOPE, CAN’T LET THAT ONE GO Seriously, we live in a country where one out of five children live in poverty, where a crisis of missing and murdered aboriginal women is ignored , where trashing the environment isn’t a political deal-breaker  and now our courts are saying “fuck the homeless”, too? Even though it wouldn’t be too hard to help? Ya know, Canadians seem like good people but we sure elect bastards.

5. STILL NOT OVER IT I mean, Alberta’s been wealthier in the past quarter century than it’s ever been or will be, probably. And the child poverty rates are the same? One might suggest that Conservatives just do not give a shit.

6. NOT FANS OF FANTINO Speaking of awful Conservatives, the NDP and Liberals want Veterans Affairs minister Julian Fantino to resign for totally sucking. I remember when this guy was the race-baiting, activist-hating Toronto police chief. He’s sure done well for someone who’s made Canada worse.

7. HERE COMES CLINTON Hillary heads to Saskatoon.

8. DON’T DISS THE PRESIDENT’S DAUGHTERS Some Republican jerk resigns. Good.

9. A NAZI MASS MURDERER IS DEAD Also good.

10. A SAUDI WOMAN IS ARRESTED FOR DRIVING Eff Saudi Arabia.

11. RACISTS ARE LOOSE IN THE GALAXY Apparently black stormtroopers are controversial in some quarters. Huh. 

12. HOW WAS BLACK FRIDAY? Meh.

13. WHAT ABOUT IN CANADA? Shrug.

14. BUT THE BASIC IDEA OF BLACK FRIDAY IS OKAY, RIGHT? Nope.

15. OH. HOW ABOUT CYBER MONDAY? Um, well, I can get behind this and especially this.

CAN WE WRAP THIS UP WITH A DISTURBING VIDEO CRITICIZING RAMPANT, DISGUSTING AMERICAN-STYLE CONSUMERISM? We sure can! This delightful confection is called Ham, and you can read an interview with its director, Eric Wareheim, here. A quote:

I was visiting my relatives in St. Louis and we were going to a Wal-Mart to stock up on ammunition because my uncle was going to take us shooting at the range. And at the Wal-Mart there were about six or seven enormously obese people on Rascal scooters all trying to get in the front door at the same time. It was like a logjam. Then I walked in and noticed more of these Rascal scooters were going up to McDonald’s, which was inside Wal-Mart, and they would get their Big Macs and sodas and they would shop with the food, so they would be taking clothes and putting them on their bodies for sizing and they’d be all stained with ketchup and meat grease. It was just unbelievable. And then we went to the ammunition section and it’s literally right next to the toy section, which I couldn’t believe. So this whole idea of how our society is going toward fast food, obesity, and all the gun violence that’s been going on for the past couple years—it hit me really hard and I wanted to make something kind of showing the future of America, or actually present day America.

Eww! And here’s the video. Have a LOVELY evening!

Author: Stephen Whitworth

Prairie Dog editor Stephen Whitworth was carried to Regina in a swarm of bees. He's been with Prairie Dog since May 1999 and will die at his keyboard before admitting his career a terrible, terrible mistake.

One thought on “Daily Aggregation: Aaaarrrrrrrrrgh”

Comments are closed.