Breaking News

Hot TubI guess there was a big hot tub sale in town this weekend.

How do I know? Well, when I was out for a walk last evening I came across a string of five or six signs stuck in the boulevard on Victoria Ave. between Scarth and Hamilton St. The signs were anchored by what looked like repurposed/rusted croquet wickets. During the time they were up they certainly added a nice decorative accent to downtown Regina. Although one sign had come loose from its mooring and was just lying on the grass with the wicket still stuck in the ground so that was unfortunate.

Author: Gregory Beatty

Greg Beatty is a crime-fighting shapeshifter who hatched from a mutagenic egg many decades ago. He likes sunny days, puppies and antique shoes. His favourite colour is not visible to your inferior human eyes. He refuses to write a bio for this website and if that means Whitworth writes one for him, so be it.

9 thoughts on “Breaking News”

  1. Hot tubbing. Hmmm. I think it’s the one activity that gets weirder and weirder the closer you are to the people you’re doing it with. In a public place with complete strangers, it’s okay. With semi-strangers, it’s anxiety-ridden brutality, as long as you have a modicum of class. With ppl you really know well, it’s just kind of gross. And on the technical side, the water in a hot tub should never be called “water”; it should be referred to its proper classification of “fluid”.

  2. I believe only in hot tubs for therapeutic purposes, which can occasionally be in a leisure setting, such as at Schmirler or the Lawson, non-prescribed, BUT for party-leisure purposes…well, it was all confirmed all too well the one time I succumbed to peer pressure at the age of 19 or so joined a hot tub party one night… My leg drifted over and brushed the leg of the macho f*ckface across from me, which allowed him to unleash a homophobic tirade and barrage of insults. From that moment on I’ve definitely committed to an uncompromising 100% rejection of private hot tubbing.

  3. I would actually add hot tubs to the list of personal safety concerns, and not just because of the potential for drowning.

    I would actually feel more safe in a Detroit crack house than I would in a Saskatchewan hot tub party.

  4. Or, if you’re a shower person, install a pulsating shower head. Sitting in filth, even if it`s aerated, is still sitting in filth.

  5. [Telephone rings – Kramer pulls a cordless phone from his pocket]

    KRAMER: Cosmo, go. No, no, na, na. (he pushes the end button and
    pushes the antenna down) Boy this new telephone number’s driving me
    crazy — wrong numbers, every five minutes.

    JERRY: What is it?

    KRAMER: Well it’s 555-3455.

    JERRY: 555-3455.

    KRAMER: Yeah.

    JERRY: (picks up the phone on the coffee table) “555-3455.” Well wait a
    second, don’t you see that’s 555-FILK.

    KRAMER: What’s Filk?

    JERRY: Filk’s nothing, but 555-FILM is Moviefone*.

    KRAMER: Oh Moviefone.

    JERRY: Yes, so people are just dialing it by mistake and getting you.

    KRAMER: So, I’m Filk?

    JERRY: You’re Filk.

    KRAMER: Oh, Mama.

Comments are closed.