Aw NHL Naw Extra: Calgary Man To Hang Out With Sport Chek Employee

fightJarome Iginla has been traded from one professional ice hockey team to another professional ice hockey team. *puts straw into juicebox* So what does this all mean?

It’s a trade that will make the Pittsburgh Penguins better (Holy shit did they really get Iginla, Brenden Morrow and Douglas “Swedish Guy With The Most Canadian Name Ever” Murray all in a week’s time?), the Boston Bruins extra pissy (Their fans will probably maintain the same level of racism, though.) and give Calgary Flames fans a sense of hope that rebuilding is finally going to happen.

Congratulations Flames fans, at least when you’re firmly in the basement you can feel something. No more pressing a curling iron against your forearm just to “like know you’re still alive, man.” First thing you get to feel: The realization that Ray Shero swindled you like a¬†moustachioed silent picture villain. It’s not a great deal for Calgary, but it still qualifies as progress.

This trade also means that trade deadline day is going to suck more balls than usual. Roughly six cubic meters more balls by my count. Are you going to skip work or school or your BDSM appointment to watch James Duthie shrug for eight hours and eat fruit snacks because nothing of interest is going to happen? (Level of interest may vary depending on how much of a tizzy Ryane Clowe gets you in.) Be sure to have a few bags of wine with you while watching deadline day stuff this year. Things have to get exciting and unpredictable somehow.

Author: Dan MacRae

An Italian inventor often referred to as the father of long distance radio transmission. Known for his development of Marconi's law and his vocals in Love Inc.

4 thoughts on “Aw NHL Naw Extra: Calgary Man To Hang Out With Sport Chek Employee”

  1. Is that six cubic metres of pure ball, like one giant scallop, or 6 cubic metres of individual balls, like a huge box of packing peanuts?

    As for trade deadline day, it doesn’t hold a candle to the four-day sausage fest that is NHL draft weekend.

  2. Somehow it pays to know who Dallas took in 432nd round. It must come up in job interviews, or at least around the water cooler. “Shit, yeah, Rogers…Dmetri Rogers, Stanley’s little boy, from Lower Lunenburg. All of just 15 years old, but wrists like a lobster fisherman and isn’t afraid to hit teh books either by the sounds of it.”

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