FILM by Shane “No Hoverboard” Hnetka

It’s 2015 and I know what you’re thinking: “Where the hell is my hoverboard?” There are no hoverboards. Sorry.

Back To The Present

30 years ago, Robert Zemeckis and Bob Gale crafted a little time-travel movie for Steven Spielberg that became a huge hit. You might have heard of it? Anyway, when it came time to continue the story with a sequel, Zemeckis and Gale sent Marty McFly and Doc Brown 30 years into the future.

Their arrival date? Wednesday, Oct. 21, 2015. Hey, wait a minute…

Zemeckis claimed their depiction of the future (now present) wasn’t meant to be accurate, because, he said, they had no hope of getting it right. And sure enough, they didn’t. There’s no Jaws 19 (though 3D is still rampant), no flying cars, no self-tying shoelaces (Nike claims they’re coming) and, while the Chicago Cubs have made the playoffs they have NOT won the World Series.

Nevertheless, several things Zemeckis and Gale speculated would exist in 2015 actually do. Flat-screen TVs are awesome, there are cameras everywhere, and we’ve got video call and thumbprint I.D. capability on our cell phones.

The ubiquitous use of fax machines was waaay off, though. And I’m still waiting for my hoverboard.

Cinema In The Cemetery

This is pretty cool. In Minneapolis, there’s a film revival group called Trylon that screens classic and cult cinema year round. Even cooler: it’s been showing horror movies in a graveyard. So far, Trylon’s “Cinema In The Cemetery” has played The Haunting, Poltergeist, Santo and Blue Demon Against the Monsters and the 1922 silent masterpiece, Häxan: Witchcraft Through the Ages with a live orchestra!!! The shows happen in the Pioneers And Soldiers Memorial Cemetery, which was founded in 1853. The screenings are fundraisers to help restore and maintain the historic cemetery.

While I’m not travelling to Minneapolis just to see a movie, I was almost tempted. It’s still a cool idea — a nice, creepy setting to watch a spooky movie. Regina has Cinema Under The Stars in Victoria Park — which is pretty awesome — but our cemeteries (one of them founded in 1883!) are entirely movie-less. It would be awesome to watch something like Häxan in a local graveyard. It could even be done for charity. Someone steal this idea, please.

Shane Hnetka is a Regina film and comic book nerd. This month he’s writing the daily Halloween film series 31 Days Of Hammer at prairiedogmag.com.

2015-10-15