One day I woke up and realized that all my interests, hobbies, goals, ideas, and understanding of  the science of mutation can be traced directly back to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Everything I need to know, I learned from the Ninja Turtles.

Many will tell you that Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird originally created the Ninja Turtles in the early 1980s as an indie comic intended to parody the many teen/mutant/animal comics popular at the time.

But I think the real reason they came up with this idea is because turtles are rad.

See? Turtles are cute.

But don’t eff with them or they’ll eff your ess up so badly, your face will look like a pizza from Dimension X.

Yeah, I know that last one is a tortoise, but they’re all testudines. Which of course is Latin for “Damn I love being a turtle!!!”